These Singapore Preschools Are So Beautifully Extra

The way some pre-schools here look and operate these days will make us adults feel real jealz.

We are talking about “Wallpaper”-worthy fixtures, floor-to-ceiling windows that let in sunlight from lush outdoor gardens (and the Olympic pool), and meticulously-curated hipster (but still child-friendly, phew!) furniture that interior-styling-poster-girl Priscilla Tan would approve of.

And we haven’t even started on the in-house kitchens – some come with resident chefs and nutritionists – where meals with fancy terms like “organic”, “free-range” and “gluten-free” are concocted.

Wah, even nicer than where we work and what we eat, okay.

But if you are paying $2,000 a month or more for your two-year-old to get his head start in life (and for you to finally enjoy some me time away from your <said through clenched teeth> bundle of joy), your standards will also be higher, no?

Odyssey The Global Preschool

In the pre-school world, there are the Kia Ceratos and there are the Pagani Zondas. Guess which one Odyssey is and here’s a hint: their campuses are at Fourth Avenue and in the Orchard and East Coast areas (means not near HDB estates lah).

Most of these are equipped with a Jam Studio where your kid can act out her Billie Eilish fantasies and also an art atelier but the Orchard branch is said to have a registered nurse and a fitness specialist too. Because health is wealth.

Pat’s Schoolhouse at Kovan

How big can a pre-school get? Well, this one at six storeys high and spanning over 22,000 sq ft is bigger than some buildings masquerading as condos. There are music and cookery rooms (note the plural terms), and a cycling track as well as a “panoramic” rooftop playground. Gosh, it’s almost like checking into a holiday resort.

Mulberry Learning at Braddell

If you are a fussy parent who doesn’t like your spawn getting grimy and sun-baked outside, you will love how this pre-school has a massive indoor playground with a ball pit and a huge slide, complete with a mini jogging and cycling track.

EtonHouse Thomson

Not only does this have a lap pool, it also boasts a “dedicated dining space by the poolside”. To train your kids to eat al fresco next time when they (or you) are rich enough to own a bungalow-with-a-dedicated-dining-space-by-the-poolside IRL. The kiddie menu is also one of the most sophisticated ones we have seen. Forget mundane oatmeal or bee hoon here. Your child will be fed Tandoori Fish Tikka with Aloo Gobi or Wholemeal Linguine with Pomodoro Sauce and Haricot Beans (which we had to Google, tbh).

Early Learning Village

How long is your condo pool? Well, the one at this preschool is 20m long (you can see it at the 3:13 mark in the video above). It also supposedly has a parent café so you can mingle – well, at least in pre-Covid-19 days – with other like-minded adults and possibly discuss how you can nurture the next Joseph Schooling.

Sparkletots Large Preschool at Punggol

This pre-school chain has always been a dependable and popular name, just like a McDonald’s double cheeseburger. But its Edgefield Plains branch is more like a Meatsmith burger.

A three-storey spaceship-shaped building is school for 1,000 young children – the silhouette isn’t there for fun only; it is meant to reduce congestion during drop-off and pick-up hours. Meanwhile, the 36 classrooms are tucked inwards like pizza slices so that they can be easily segregated during a disease outbreak (hello, Covid). Plus, there is a herb and vegetable farm, and what even kidults want: a slide that lets you zip down from your classroom on your way out of school.

And for all this effort, the school building won its architects the President’s Design Award last year. Can we move to Punggol liao?

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