Baby Talk: Stop Judging Mums Who Wear Makeup While Giving Birth

I didn’t post any photos of myself after giving birth, partly because I was too tired to use Instagram, but mostly because after 36 hours of labour, I looked like a bloodied and bespectacled Jabba the Hutt—a far cry from That Mum who gets her brows done a week before her EDD, or who packs her Dyson Airwrap in her hospital bag. 

That Mum looks like she’s taken a shower. That Mum’s birth photos show her in tears cradling her little one, without nary an eyelash out of place, skin glowing from the combined power of post-labour endorphins and Chanel Sublimage L’essence de Teint. Up close, she smells like freesia and tangerines. 

That Mum also attracts a swarm of critics after posting her photos online: 

“Did the 20 hours of labour include 6 hours for hair and makeup?”

“Who brings a ring light to the hospital?”

“Photographers allowed in the room meh?” 

IMAGE: 123RF

Sometimes That Mum is an influencer or a celebrity. But sometimes she’s just a regular mum who wants to look presentable while capturing one of her life’s biggest milestones. And is that such a crime? 

Truth be told, I never considered dolling up in the labour ward, but maybe I should have. During my first few months postpartum, I barely had time to shower and apply skincare, let alone put on makeup. It’s been 11 months since I gave birth, and I’ve used a blow-dryer exactly twice. Such are the demands of an infant–self-care gets shafted in the wake of endless hunger cries and diaper changes. 

At first, I wore my haggard appearance like a badge of honour: Look at how hard I laboured, and look at how much I’m sacrificing now! Why haven’t I worn mascara in 11 months, you ask? Because both hands are occupied carrying a baby. What are all these other mums doing? 

But now that it’s been over a year, I wonder why I deprived myself of one last moment of self-care when I still had time for it. Giving birth is one of the hardest, most vulnerable moments of a woman’s life: you spend hours being poked and prodded by medical personnel–you’re lucky if you don’t poop on the table or vomit after the epidural wears off. All this, while knowing you or your child could literally die from the strain. If a bit of tinted lip balm helps you face what’s ahead with a little more strength, then more power to you, and who are strangers to judge? 

IMAGE: 123RF

As long as social media exists, we’re going to see mums posting glammed-up photos. Need we expect women who who wear makeup on a regular basis to forgo it when giving birth? For what? Rawness and authenticity? Women wear makeup on date nights, job interviews, and during their weddings. They wear it in the office, during brunch, and at family events. Some women even wear it when running marathons. Giving birth in itself is a kind of marathon, so we can't fault someone for wanting to look and feel good while doing it, especially if she'll be photographed afterward. 

Maybe the better question isn’t “Why is she wearing so much makeup?” and “Why should we care?” 

It’s not just envy. It’s pressure. When birth photos look like magazine spreads, the bar for motherhood rises: as if pushing out a whole human weren’t enough, now we have to look flawless after doing it. Everyone knows that giving birth is hard. A bit of highlight, contour, and setting spray make it look easy. But why should it? 

At best, perfect makeup helps women feel confident during one of life’s rawest, most brutal moments. At worst, it perpetuates a standard that few can live up to without a bit of photo editing and the budget (not to mention the time) for $200 lash extensions. 

But blaming individual mothers for wanting to feel beautiful misses the point. The problem isn’t makeup, it's that we're even scrutinising how someone looks after giving birth.  When lashes, lipstick, and blusher leave more of an impression than the fact that a woman just brought a whole human into the world—and lived to smile about it—we've lost sight of what really matters. Maybe it's time to stop analysing women's appearances in the labour ward and start honouring childbirth, and the people who go through it, for what it really is: nothing short of extraordinary. 

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