Missing Bae During The Circuit Breaker? Here's How To Keep The Spark Alive
So we’re a week into the circuit breaker, and you’re already wondering if you and bae/bao/babe/bb will last until 4 May, or whenever this thing will end. You didn’t plan to be long distance, but here you are, living just a few neighbourhoods apart, and unable to meet #SIAN
You’re afraid that things will cool off. That your other half will get tired of you, get tired of conjuring conversation openers other than “what are you doing at home?” and “what did you order on GrabFood today”? Locked indoors, you feel deprived of the opportunity to go out on dates, let alone build a life, with your other half.
“Sorry I’m practicing social distancing” is about to be the most popular break up text of 2020— Ali Kolbert (@AliKolbert) March 12, 2020
No one knows when life will go back to normal. But that doesn’t mean your relationship needs to be in a holding cell while you wait. You can still make memories together. And who knows – maybe one day you’ll look back on all this and realise that in the process of making memories, you made progress.
Here’s how to get started:
Plan a dinner date over Zoom
Yeah, we know. It’s super corny. We rolled our eyes when we first read about an estranged couple who celebrated their anniversary by dressing up, lighting candles, and drinking wine over Zoom, but making an effort to be silly together will help close some of the distance. Laughter is the best medicine, right?
Designate a show or a series as your ‘quarantine show’ and watch it together over Netflix Party
This will not only give your relationship a bit of a rhythm, but it will serve as a fun shared experience amidst all the other boring stuff you’re both enduring. Make sure you Zoom or Facetime with each other while watching so that you can catch each other giggling at the same scenes.
Order food delivery for your other half
By now, you’re probably all-too-familiar with what your other half likes to order for lunch and dinner, as well as what they would order, were it not for the $7 delivery fee. Save them the trouble of choosing between chicken cutlet aglio oglio and fishball mee pok by surprising them with that one thing they love to eat, but that they’re hesitant to splurge on.
Surprise them with flowers or a cake
What’s more romantic than flowers for no reason? Flowers amidst the impending apocalypse, which your other half is suffering graciously while sitting through endless videoconferences! Your beloved probably looks and feels like crap after spending the last few days in pyjamas, but a surprise bouquet or a box of pastries will add a little bit of colour to their day.
Play a game together
We know this sounds like something straight out of You’ve Got Mail or a Chinese campus drama, but if you can’t be together in real life, then you might as well meet each other in a game. You can visit each other’s islands on Animal Crossing: New Horizons. Or you can flirtatiously scream at each other while playing Draw Something on the Houseparty app (bonus: this app makes you turn on your cameras). Or you can make like an old couple and solve a crossword together over Zoom.
Sign up for an online course together
It could be an online yoga programme. Or it could be university-level academia. If anything, learning something new will give you and your partner one more thing to talk about other than the coronavirus, and one more thing to compete over other than the number of naps you’ve taken while working from home.
Make goals and hold each other accountable
The coronavirus-induced shut-ins are a once-in-a-generation experience. Ask each other what you want to do with this time. What can you do now, that you couldn’t do when life was normal? It can be as simple as reading more, learning to cook, or spending time with your family. Tell each other what you want to do and encourage each other when you start to feel yourselves losing momentum.
Communicate, communicate, communicate
It might be tempting to let your relationship stall by the wayside until you can see each other again, but relationships are like plants. Without water, they wither. Tell your partner how much you miss them. Make sure they know how excited you are to see them again. If your isolation and the state of the world are stressing you out, let them know – they likely still want to be there for you, even if they can’t give you a hug. And above all, dream big. Instead of thinking about the circuit breaker as an obstacle to your relationship, think about ways that it can strengthen what you have together. If you can get through this, you can get through so much more.