Pek Chek With Your WFH & SFH Sitch? We Get You...
This is The Week when most of us have started to work, study and eat lots of keropok from home.
If that once sounded like a super shiok thing to do, you will probably not be thinking so by the time CB Day <insert the day when you are reading this article> is over.
Well, unless you are one of those lucky ones living in a GCB with so much room that you only bump into your sister on the mezzanine level once every three months.
Or unless you are married to someone who has reasonable personal hygiene standards or who won’t nick that last packet of Twisties you have carefully stashed away (bonus points if he or she ticks both boxes here).
Or unless your parents don’t keep asking you if a) they can vacuum your room every hour; b) if you can vacuum the flat every hour.
Otherwise, you will recognise these situations. But what to do? Just keep calm, stay home and breathe lor – through a face mask.
Your dining table is your work desk. And also your siblings’. And also your kids’ study desks.
The only group clustering that’s allowed for now is at your dining table (because you were wise enough not to queue up at Ikea for a proper study desk). Meal times can get chaotic because you have to cart off all your books, files and laptops, only to return them back to the table once the grazing is over. Well, at least you don’t have to go to the gym to tone your arms (also, because you can’t liao).
If you are the designated cook, you now have to make many more meals and dishes.
It’s like one of those Math problem sums that we could never solve back in primary school. If Spouse only eats chicken, Son only eats fish, Daughter doesn’t want carbs, Mother hates vegetables and You are a vegetarian, what do you serve the whole family – three meals a day, every day?
You can restock the fridge or food cabinet 182 times in a day.
But someone is always taking that last stick of KitKat. Yet nobody wants to go to the supermarket.
You never knew your spouse had such weird work habits.
Like reading every e-mail out aloud, clapping and shouting “YES!” after drafting a proposal, and sucking loudly on mints. No wonder he doesn’t have frolleagues.
Everyone has a Zoom meeting at 2pm.
Maybe now you will empathise with all those poor call centre reps and their work conditions – cloistered in a room, trying to hear what the other party is saying on the line and trying to get your point across succinctly and loudly, with 20 other people trying to do the same too.
You pray that your family members and pets don’t embarrass you when you are doing a video conference.
Suddenly, the baby decides to have a meltdown, your toddler yanks your hair, your grandmother shouts for you (and using your childhood nickname at that), your pet tortoise farts and your spouse walks out of the bathroom topless. It’s cute when this happens in a mass-forwarded meme; not when it happens IRL.
Everyone wants your attention.
It’s heart-warming that your whole family is safe at home with you and that they all want to tell you about their work, ask you about their homework and make you do the housework… until this goes on and on for, like, one full day and then you realise #metime is not just some silly thing thought up by wellness bloggers, hotel spa copywriters and hermits.
Your parents are always asking you to do something.
If you are 13, it’s homework. If you are 30, it’s housework.
You are always asking your kids/spouse to do something.
How come everyone is now at home but there’s still nobody around to help clean up an increasingly messy and dirty home?