Your 2022 Horoscope – The Singapore Edition

It seemed like just yesterday when it was only 2019 and we were young, naïve and carefree, and the only masks we knew of were Halloween monster ones or SK-II facial sheet masks.

What will 2022 be like for us in Singapore?

Aries

2022 will be a prosperous year for you, especially if you are heading into a new business venture like selling NFTs of your pet hamster’s paw prints. Pay attention to your newly-minted finances and with them, you will get to travel somewhere exotic but fate and the gods won’t have a hand in deciding this – the VTLs will. Sometime in the year, you may also meet a potential soulmate who will look at you the way you look at extra-greasy char kway teow.

Taurus

It’s going to be a constant dilemma between having security and gaining freedom for you this year. So, maybe you want to travel and go mask-less in another country but maybe you also don’t want to spend half your paycheck on PCR and ART swabs, post-vacation. And like all trending K-dramas, there may be a plot twist in your love life. In fact, someone you have not seen for years will appear… more than once. Like that smoking neighbour living above your flat.

Gemini

Maybe you’re born with it, or maybe it’s the lingering Eau de Zichar scent that always seems to follow you around. But Geminis will find themselves being very charismatic this year. Expect to charm your bosses, social distancing ambassadors, in-laws and, most importantly, the chye png rice stall aunty who will give you one extra piece of sambal squid. And because your personality is so sparkling this year, you will feel more ready to go out and socialise. There may be a promotion coming your way but taking it up will also cause burnout. Don’t say we never say.

Cancer

How far you progress in your career this year will depend largely on how open you are to learning new technology. So, if your boss asks you to film a Renegade dance for TikTok, become besties with your 13-year-old niece and ask her how.

Leo

Group activities and team events – subject to prevailing Covid-19 measures, of course – will let you shine and impress everyone else. It gets even better if you dare to take on new challenges. So, if you have always played golf, switch to ribbon twirling instead. And if you have always used your handphone to check in at cafes, shake things up and use your Trace Token.

Virgo

This is your year to take risks in your career (just don’t share with your parents yet that you aim to become the next badminton world champion by the age of 49). To do so, pick up new skills and stimulate yourself mentally. Trying to find the right train platform at the Dhoby Ghaut MRT station always works for us.

Libra

Health will be your main focus this year and we mean both the physical and the mental. This is because if toxic friends and relatives have been bugging you in 2021, inhale deeply now: you will finally get a much-needed break from them. But a better mood may also see you eating more than necessary so get yourself an exclusion order from your neighbourhood group buys and instead, go walk the Rail Corridor.

Scorpio

We hate to break it to you but while the 12 other star signs will be making many travel plans this year, you, dear Scorpio, will not have any wanderlust. What you will have lots of is lust as this is a year of heart-eye-emoji relationships for you. You may be torn between a couple or more choices though: should you date that mysterious stranger on Paktor or meet your colleague’s cousin?

Sagittarius

Scorpios won’t be the only ones staying put in Singapore in 2022. They can find a friend in the Sags who will also be very home-based (and very creative). So, invest in a comfy ergonomic work chair for more Zoom or Google Meet video discussions ahead, especially if you do creative work like needle-felting quokkas or writing 2022 horoscopes. We see a special reunion in the near future but our crystal ball doesn’t reveal how many people will be involved because you know the pattern by now: two pax, then five pax, maybe eight pax, and back to two pax.

Capricorn

We’re sorry that this breaking news came after the new ABSD rates kicked in last year but 2022 could see you investing in property. Along the way, a new friendship could grow into a special romance. Like, maybe you meet a really chio property agent when you shop around for your investment property and the line “what’s the rental yield” has never sounded sexier?

Aquarius

A transformation may happen, especially in health matters (yay, finally you reached your ideal BMI!). If you have been thinking about starting a home-based business, you will most likely succeed. But watch your tongue as you may get into a few petty quarrels this year.

Pisces

2022 sounds like a huat year for you. First, you will have so many business or work opportunities that you won’t even know which one to choose (note to headhunters: poach a Pisces this year). Next, you will get to travel a lot. And for some unfair reason, you will also come into a lot of money. But with money comes great responsibility, said some creepy-crawly superhero in blue-and-red spandex (or not). Don’t haolian about your paycheck or your TOTO winnings because doing so will invite malicious gossip or, worse, fake friends who won’t Paynow you back for that Odette dinner.

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